The first meeting
Online dating is a convenient way to meet up with friends. The reason is simple: when we meet online, we can get to know each other a bit before coming face to face. We can thus eliminate candidates who do not have values compatible with us, and thus have less risk of finding themselves in a meeting with someone who displeases us, does not interest us, or to whom we do not. nothing to say.
However, as with all other means of making new acquaintances, whether it is a dating site, a social network, or crossing someone by chance on the street, some precautions must be taken to make dating safely.
Safe meetings
Women are generally more concerned with the security aspect, as much when they are looking for a man on a dating site, as when they go out alone at night. Thus, the security aspect that follows is more for ladies, even if gentlemen may find things that might interest them as well.
Keep your personal information secret
It might sound trivial, but with a full name, phone number, Facebook page, or even an email address, it's possible to get a lot of personal information about you, like your home address or location. of work.
Only reveal this information to someone you have met in person several times and trust enough to invite them to your home.
Also, do not give out your account password, and make sure that it cannot be easily guessed. For example, do not use as a password the name of your animal that you mention in your correspondence, and especially not your own pseudonym on the dating site, nor your first name!
Chat first on the dating site
Before giving another way to reach you, talk a little with your correspondents on the dating site.
Our moderation team performs quality checks and verifications on member profiles 24 hours a day, in order to ban fake profiles, verify complaints from other users and investigate members who trigger alerts with suspicious behavior (example : a high number of messages containing the word "money").
By keeping your first exchanges on the site, you might notice that one day, the account of one of your correspondents is suddenly deactivated, without him notifying you that he will be leaving soon. It is possible that in his joy at having met someone, he simply forgot to warn his other penpals, but it is also possible that we have banned him because his profile was false or because another member has filed a complaint against him after receiving disgraceful comments from him.
Thus, by keeping your matches on our dating site, you benefit from additional protection, which you do not have with your personal email address.
If you still want to give another way to contact you, choose an email address reserved exclusively for your online meetings, rather than your email address at work or with your Internet provider.
Before meeting in person
He likes you, he likes you. Great !
But before you meet in person, it's a good idea to talk to each other on the phone a bit.
Dating online is ideal for people who are a little shy, since communicating in writing is much less stressful than talking. But it's also easier to pass yourself off as someone else on the internet than face to face. Also, written messages do not always accurately reflect the intonation or attitude of people.
If one of your correspondents is very charming in writing, but speaks to you in an urgent, disparaging or disrespectful tone, it is better to find out over a confidential telephone line than in person.
To help our members in this important step, we offer a confidential phone number service. By going through our systems, your telephone number remains confidential.
If you still choose to use your own phone rather than our secret number service, at least protect yourself a little by using your mobile phone rather than the one at home or at work. This number is easier to change if someone starts calling you at night, and it cannot be used to get your home or business address.
Where to meet?
To meet a stranger, or even someone you vaguely know, meet in a fairly busy public place, such as a restaurant, cafe, busy shopping street, store, sports center, etc.
Avoid places that are too private, remote, dark, noisy or anonymous, such as bars, cinemas, parks, woodlands, residential or low-traffic areas.
Ideally, choose a place that you know well and usually go to. So you will already be familiar with the surroundings and how to get home from there. In addition, a familiar place that you like will make you feel more comfortable, relaxed and in your element.
Choose the time of your meeting
Favor appointments during the day. There will be more people around you, and you won't have to go home in the dark. In addition, you will have more energy, you will have an excellent excuse to refuse a drink of alcohol, you will not have to worry about an evening dress and the bill will be lower (which will cause you less discomfort if he insists on paying it).
Preparations before the first meeting
To have peace of mind, take some precautions before your meeting.
Plan your own transportation for the outward and return trip
Notify your loved ones by telling them where you are going, who you are meeting and what time you are coming back.
Date a loved one soon after you meet and let them know. For example: "Sorry, I can't stay any longer. I told my sister I would go shopping with her after our date." Not only does it make it clear that someone knows where you are and is waiting for your return, it will force you to stick to your original plan and it gives you a way out if the date is a disaster.
Think immediately of a second date. If the meeting goes well, you will already be ready with a proposal for a second meeting in a place and at a time that suits you.
During the meeting
Stay sober
It is essential to make a good first impression but also to keep your sense of judgment. If you choose to drink anyway, exercise moderation and limit yourself to one drink. Don't be afraid to offend him by politely refusing the other glasses he offers you.
Keep your personal belongings with you
Don't leave your mobile phone, keys, ID cards and purse lying around.
Do not consume food or drink left unattended
Apologize for going to the bathroom before ordering and after you are done.
A first date is a little embarrassing, even stressful. It's okay to feel a little awkward with someone you meet for the first time, but listen to your instincts.
Are you just embarrassed or making you uncomfortable?
Are you nervous about not having topics to talk about or because he's pushy and demanding?
Are you just afraid you won't like him, or are you afraid of him?
Do you feel safe with him?
If you have the wrong impression, feel free to end the date and leave. You just have to tell him that at the end of the day, in person, it doesn't click.
Remember: you have no obligation
You've met him in person to see if the chemistry is just there, and it's not binding on you. You both took this chance, knowing that there was a chance you might not be enjoying yourself.
After the meeting
Stick to your original plan.
Even if the meeting goes wonderfully and it's love at first sight, don't change your plan along the way. If he offers to continue the meeting elsewhere, to stay later, or to take you home, politely decline. It can be difficult when we are in the moment, when we have butterflies in our stomachs, when we are very interested in the other. So, to soften your rejection, let him know that you enjoyed your meeting and want to see him again soon, but that you really can't stay. If he is also under the spell, he will certainly be a little disappointed, but he will understand and appreciate your transparency. Men in general appreciate it more when a woman tells him frankly and directly that she wants to see him again, rather than having to guess that in the mysterious code language of women, accepting another coffee means that she is interested.
Don't forget to let your loved ones know when you return!
Do you have a lot in common and her profile picture doesn't do justice to her look that makes you melt? Despite all the excitement, don't forget that you promised to call your best friend back before 4 p.m. to let her know you've come home!